|Caribbean Blues: Buck Island at Sunset|
Depression has come and gone in my life so many times that I have come to recognize it when it hits. I know what to do and I know how to handle it, but that knowledge doesn't make it any easier, I still have to sit with myself and wait for the storms to pass.
Most people experience some form of situational depression from time to time, but people who have never suffered the effects of severe, debilitating depression cannot fathom what clinically depressed people go through. In much the same way, I cannot imagine what it must be like to have never felt the hopelessness, fear and intense pain associated with this illness. Before the "I’m the only one who feels this way-s" crept in, I actually believed that everyone suffered from the kind of depression I did at some point, and if they said they didn't, they were just lying to seem somehow better than those of us who do.
A few weeks back, and in the midst of my latest battle with the ugly depression monster, I happened upon this post, from the blog Hyperbole and a Half. It was the most insightful, real, honest and funny expression of how depression can feel, that I have ever come across. I related to it so well that I cried and then - I laughed, hysterically (to the point of tears rolling down my cheeks). I think I laughed about being depressed for the first time. EVER.
And it felt good, really good.